Slow down, breathe a little deeper.
I went home to Fairhope, Alabama over the weekend + the beginning of the week. I needed to be still, even while continuing to work on current projects + editing + emails. I found that I was too distracted in Birmingham. Too anxious, too demanding, too impatient, and I needed home to help me breathe.
The air outside, crisp. The afternoon sun peering through the big kitchen window. 1 cup of almond flour. 1/2 cup of coconut sugar. Never quite exact. The smell of organic pumpkin puree and honey and vanilla and cinnamon and the littlest bit of nutmeg. Warm, comforting aromas of autumn spilling through the house. The oven beeps, the doughnuts go in. Cook books on the shelves, some filled with my grandmother's recipes, measuring cups, a little spilled flour. Hair in my face, but I can't put it behind my ears. Messy hands, full of dough.
This is inspiration.
It is baking. It's messing up a kitchen and thinking only about the tablespoons and 1/3 cups, hands covered in powdery white flour, thinking about how that littlest bit of nutmeg could make the whole recipe.
It is reading... Drinking in the 12 pt. font of black words on white pages that add up to create a whole entire world in your mind. Each detail, completely imagined and wonderful.
It is going on a long afternoon walk. Crunching the autumn leaves, listening to the sounds of the earth. Wind, grass, sky, cars passing, children walking home from school. Dogs playing.
"Be inspired by being present." That is what I am learning. I have been walking into moments begging them to inspire me... How exhausting?! I am fearful, I guess. Fearful that I won't succeed, fearful that I won't be enough, that I won't make enough, that I won't edit enough, shoot enough, post enough... I want to be original, but how?! When my mind is clouded by thousands of photographs that aren't mine. Thousands of ideas that aren't mine. Constant comparison on social media, constant "need-to-do-more" mindset.
There is always the "no time" excuse. I make that quite often. Well, I choose to make time. To bake, to read, to walk, to write... To take my eyes off of the screen of other people's experiences and to have my own. To be completely present, to sweetly invite the inspiration to join me. Demanding it would be rude, anyways.